mistake of NOT taking my book of choice into the eye doctor’s office recently and picked up a magazine to keep me busy. I am not one of those that read many magazines except for cooking, computer or photo oriented ones. I use to read a lot of National Geographic, Life, Time, Discover and other science magazines, but since I retired I do not gravitate toward them anymore. So I randomly picked up a magazine. I just know it was one I normally do not read and started reading an article about different types of husbands you do/do not want to marry. Before I even started the article I thought to myself, yeah, I bet women would apply to these same characteristic as well. How would you know what type of husband you will be getting in the first place for you have not married him yet. A bad habit of mine is finding the negative before I even begin to read. Number one on the list was the “abusive” husband. Pointing out that physical abuse was not only appalling but so was being a victim to psychological and mental abuse as well. I shudder when I think about these women who have to suffer because of men like this. Thank God, I am one of those lucky women who was blessed with a husband like Jimmy.
Number two on the list was the “gigolo.” I think this is one of the reasons I cannot put this article mentally aside for as I read the article I thought about my friend, Jeri who was a classmate at Brenau University. She got fooled by such a guy. In fact he had all of us fooled. (Handsome, polite, full of great entertaining tales, neat dresser, smart, sense of humor) She was one of those extremely nice people, a friend and my Bridge Partner. (We won the majority of the time) Jeri was one of many of my classmates that came from a very affluent family. but what made her unique was her photogenic memory. She would isolate herself in her room for about two weeks and read her text books like they were a novel, go to class and for the rest of the semester she found other things to do. She was an “A” student. She was brilliant along with being very attractive. She was fun to be around and well liked. Anyway, she ended up married to him and very soon afterwards they were divorced. After he got the divorce, he even admitted to Jeri and her friends (I being one of them) that the reason he married her was for her money. He was not only a jerk, but an asshole. He took her/parents for a bundle and along with that her self-esteem. We lost contact and through the years, I have periodically thought about her. She used to live in Atlanta. I have tried to find her on the internet, Classmates and Facebook, so far to no avail. I know she became a Doctor of some sort and I have always wondered if she found a “soul mate” that made her happy.
Thirdly, there was the “Out of Towner,” the guy with wife and kids at home and a mistress in another port. I guess if we are from South Carolina, we can identify with this one. This news hit the papers after I read the article. LOL Unfortunately this has happened to a few of my acquaintances in my life time which is really sad and disgusting. While the teacher was teaching, husband was out getting his “jollies.” Again, I am one lucky lady.
Then there is Macho Man…marries and has kids. He then paints the town with his presence and is rarely at home. He likes to party and have a good time and then will go home to his
little wife that will wait on him hand and foot. One of the guys in the article, Billy, actually said he was “The Man” and it was up to his wife to provide him with what he needed when he was so inclined to need it. A woman should wait on a man after all he was the major bread earner in the family. It didn’t matter if she contributed to the household or not. Gee, I thought that way of thinking went out in the 60’s. I never realized how “female rights” oriented until I read that one. Here again, I am pretty independent when I want to be. Nothing bothers me more than for someone to tell me what to do. I tend to go in the opposite direction. This is one of my bad qualities for I can be too head-strong at times.
Let us not forget the “Couch-Potato.” Why couch-potato, why not recliner-potato or bed-potato? To be more difficult, why ruin the good name of the potato which is one of my favorite foods? The only potato I am not a fan of is the French-fry potato, but I will eat them on occasion, especially if they are spicy. Why do most people refer to men when they talk about a “couch potato” for I know many women that would fall in that category too? Anyway, the article refers to the lazy home guy. He goes to work, comes home, and heads for a reclining position. He thinks it’s the wife’s responsibility whether she works or not to take care of the household (dusting, moping, laundry, vacuuming, picking up the clothes he dropped, dishes, and kids). 
He makes excuses for not helping such as a bad day at work, tired, doesn’t feel well, doesn’t know how to do this or that and never had to learn. Some husbands are so extreme that they will walk over an item on the floor and never pick it up. He will not put trash in the trash container even if it is at his fingertips. He will put dirty dishes in the sink or on the counter without bothering to rinse them or place them in a drainer or dish washer, if available. He will occasionally help with the kids. It does not matter if the wife is sick, tired, or she too had a bad day at work. The husband simply thinks the household chores can be put off until SHE feels better. Household cleanliness and safety is not an issue. I cannot begin to name the amount of husband and wives that that I know and have known that fall in this category. Many husbands today actually believe that it is unmanly to help with housework. This too is an attitude that went out with the 60’s. They think they are “king of the hill”. This particular statement caught my attention, “Thank goodness jerks are not born that way, but for whatever reason came to be that way.” Again I fall into “boy am I lucky.” I am a jerk on occasion, but my husband…NEVER!
little wife that will wait on him hand and foot. One of the guys in the article, Billy, actually said he was “The Man” and it was up to his wife to provide him with what he needed when he was so inclined to need it. A woman should wait on a man after all he was the major bread earner in the family. It didn’t matter if she contributed to the household or not. Gee, I thought that way of thinking went out in the 60’s. I never realized how “female rights” oriented until I read that one. Here again, I am pretty independent when I want to be. Nothing bothers me more than for someone to tell me what to do. I tend to go in the opposite direction. This is one of my bad qualities for I can be too head-strong at times.
Let us not forget the “Couch-Potato.” Why couch-potato, why not recliner-potato or bed-potato? To be more difficult, why ruin the good name of the potato which is one of my favorite foods? The only potato I am not a fan of is the French-fry potato, but I will eat them on occasion, especially if they are spicy. Why do most people refer to men when they talk about a “couch potato” for I know many women that would fall in that category too? Anyway, the article refers to the lazy home guy. He goes to work, comes home, and heads for a reclining position. He thinks it’s the wife’s responsibility whether she works or not to take care of the household (dusting, moping, laundry, vacuuming, picking up the clothes he dropped, dishes, and kids). 
He makes excuses for not helping such as a bad day at work, tired, doesn’t feel well, doesn’t know how to do this or that and never had to learn. Some husbands are so extreme that they will walk over an item on the floor and never pick it up. He will not put trash in the trash container even if it is at his fingertips. He will put dirty dishes in the sink or on the counter without bothering to rinse them or place them in a drainer or dish washer, if available. He will occasionally help with the kids. It does not matter if the wife is sick, tired, or she too had a bad day at work. The husband simply thinks the household chores can be put off until SHE feels better. Household cleanliness and safety is not an issue. I cannot begin to name the amount of husband and wives that that I know and have known that fall in this category. Many husbands today actually believe that it is unmanly to help with housework. This too is an attitude that went out with the 60’s. They think they are “king of the hill”. This particular statement caught my attention, “Thank goodness jerks are not born that way, but for whatever reason came to be that way.” Again I fall into “boy am I lucky.” I am a jerk on occasion, but my husband…NEVER!
Jim and I were both teachers and coaches. Occasionally, we both held two jobs. When Jim and I got married we had an understanding that we would share in household duties. We did not have a spotless house, but we did have a tidy home. I was always scared of tripping over 
stuff, especially at night, so anything on the floor was picked up before bed time and our dishes washed. Safety was a big issue with me. Weekends or when company was on the way WE made an extra effort to dust and mop. Early in our marriage it was discovered that Sue was not to do the laundry, especially after Paige and Jay entered our lives. They did not appreciate purple/pink underwear, etc; so Jim became the major laundry man. Now, retired I will occasionally do laundry and Jim prays he doesn’t end up with pink, blue or green T-shirts. (I do NOT do his Park Ranger uniforms) Thank goodness for toilet brushes and cleaners for I do NOT like to do toilets or clean bathrooms. Jim many times did this for me too. (Believe me, he is very much appreciated) We now have his/her bathrooms so we are responsible for our own. I can remember many times Jim would pull down the ironing board and iron my son or daughter’s clothes. I will have to say my Mom kept a very clean orderly house/home and this was passed on to the four sisters. My Dad did the cooking, bathrooms, and outside work. The sisters had to keep their rooms clean and periodically help fold laundry. If there was a clean freak in the family it would be Strawn, followed closely by Peggy. Although, as a kid Peg was not that way by any means.
stuff, especially at night, so anything on the floor was picked up before bed time and our dishes washed. Safety was a big issue with me. Weekends or when company was on the way WE made an extra effort to dust and mop. Early in our marriage it was discovered that Sue was not to do the laundry, especially after Paige and Jay entered our lives. They did not appreciate purple/pink underwear, etc; so Jim became the major laundry man. Now, retired I will occasionally do laundry and Jim prays he doesn’t end up with pink, blue or green T-shirts. (I do NOT do his Park Ranger uniforms) Thank goodness for toilet brushes and cleaners for I do NOT like to do toilets or clean bathrooms. Jim many times did this for me too. (Believe me, he is very much appreciated) We now have his/her bathrooms so we are responsible for our own. I can remember many times Jim would pull down the ironing board and iron my son or daughter’s clothes. I will have to say my Mom kept a very clean orderly house/home and this was passed on to the four sisters. My Dad did the cooking, bathrooms, and outside work. The sisters had to keep their rooms clean and periodically help fold laundry. If there was a clean freak in the family it would be Strawn, followed closely by Peggy. Although, as a kid Peg was not that way by any means.
Lord, I sure got off on a tangent again. I will NOT go back and erase since I went to the trouble of typing it. Another type of husband that caught my interest was the X-husband. The one who believes it was solely the wife’s fault for all that went wrong in their marriage. The theory that it takes two to tango, two to make love and argue, and two to work on making a marriage work was beyond his comprehension. It was okay that he kept losing his job and did not contribute to the household; it was her fault he gambled, it was her fault he got caught with another woman; it her fault they did not communicate with each other, it was her fault he was drunk all the time or he used drugs, it was her fault he was abusive, it was her fault the kids were scared of him, etc. I honestly cannot remember one of my friends who have gotten a divorce during the last 41-years of being married to Jim that both in some small way must have contributed to why their marriage did not last. Jim and I did not have a perfect marriage, but we did work at it and did not give up on each other. Lack of communication in my opinion is the number one reason marriages do not last. 
I did not get a chance to read the rest of the article about the loud-obnoxious husband, the know-it-all husband, king of the household husband, the athletic husband, the butt-lazy husband, the clean freak husband, etc. (I can’t remember them all.) I went back a week later when I had to see the eye-doctor again and could not find that magazine. I was totally frustrated for I hate to read something and not finish it. For the life of me I could not remember for sure which magazine/or issue it might have been. I know if anyone was watching the way I going from table to table flipping through those magazines must have thought I was nuts. Believe it or not, except for the abusive husband, the article was humorously written in a sarcastic sort of way that made it a good, interesting read. 
I do know my hubby did not fall in any of those categories. If any of you remember reading this article by all means tell me where to find it or make a copy of it and send it to me. In the mean time, I will appreciate what a great husband I have got and thanks, Jim…James...Jimmy…Coach…husband…Dad... for 41 super years. Happy Anniversary!
Addendum: This morning upon awakening and going to the kitchen I found this awaiting me. My husband does little things like this for me all the time. How lucky can a gal get than to have such a thoughtful husband? Thanks “James” I Love YO
U.
